
Your self-esteem is ultimately how you think and feel about yourself. Think very little about yourself? You probably struggle with low self-esteem.  Generally feel good about yourself and your life? Your self-esteem is probably in good order.
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Low self-esteem is far from uncommon especially in today’s society; the images and messages we receive in the media making us feel that our lives are less than perfect because we haven’t got the confidence to be sharing pictures on Instagram in our bikinis on some exotic island, wearing the latest designer sunglasses. Oh and by the way, my nose looks much bigger than hers. You get the gist. Low self-esteem could have born from difference life experiences as a child or throughout adulthood.
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Here are some examples of low self-esteem that could be causing anxiety:
You are excessively worrying what other people think of you. You might be overthinking social interactions and thinking you are being judged or you’ve said something wrong.
You might be telling yourself you are rubbish at your job and petrified of making mistakes at work.
Talking of the fear of making mistakes and getting it wrong…. Your lack of confidence means you might be avoiding to try new things or avoiding things entirely.
You might struggle to make friends because you feel you will be rejected and think you are unlikeable…. OR undeserving of that connection?
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There are many studies out there showing the association between low self-esteem and an increased risk of anxiety. It makes sense to me; if you are not reaching the unrealistic expectations you are setting yourself, lacking confidence in the ‘thing’, or constantly telling yourself you are not good enough, smart enough, funny enough… well that’s enough for your emotional brain to start triggering that ‘captain, there is something wrong here’ threat response.
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When the brain perceives a threat, a distress signal will trigger a communication to your body which will prepare you to fight-or-flight. The fight-or-flight response causes all of those body sensations that are associated with anxiety such as increased heart rate, muscle tension and heightened alertness. The system is important; your brain is protecting you from perceived threats. However, some of those perceived threats are triggered from your thoughts; whether it is a giant grizzly bear coming for your sandwich or an upcoming social event that you are dreading (and you are fuelled with fear of judgement), the response can be the same.
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There are lots of things you can try to improve your self-esteem and reduce anxiety; a counsellor can help you challenge any negative thinking patterns and behaviours, support you in working with yourself in a compassionate and non-judgement way and help you explore your authentic self.
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